Having multiple sexual partners is not new, it goes back to the ancients. Some people form groups which have sex together or differently among their circle. Others just move from person to person. Whatever your preference, having multiple sexual partners is a thing. How you feel about that is left to you but be reminded that there are pros and cons.
Having multiple sexual partners is known as polyamory. It is done by both married people and singles whether in homosexual, heterosexual or bisexual relationships. The idea is that there are no strings attached, just sex. For some, the idea of no strings attached sex or a friends with benefits relationship is an unattainable dream. What could be better than all the excitement and fun of sex without having to worry about commitment?
Couples can fall into a polyamorous lifestyle in a few different ways. Some decide they want to search for a third member of their relationship, whereas others simply fall into the polyamorous community and find it works out better for them.
A common misconception of polyamory — the word for having multiple romantic partners — is that it’s all about people wanting to have their cake and eat it too. This may be the case for those who go “unicorn hunting,” but others in successful polyamorous relationships don’t see it that way.
Friends with benefits are most commonly thought of as a sex with a friend where the romantic side of things is absent. The idea here is that the relationship is sex only with no intention of emotional attachment or commitment.
How to become friends with benefits
Initiating casual sex with a friend can be very tricky, we certainly don’t advise you to walk up to your best friend and ask them for sex for example. Unfortunately, there isn’t an easy answer when it comes to the ‘how’ of no strings sex. Our advice would be to play it safe, see if things organically develop with a friend or acquaintance and go from there.
Reasons for having multiple sexual partners
- Persons in long distance relationship: some persons are in relationships where their partners live in another city or country. In that case, one of the partners might decide to meet other persons to satisfy them whenever they feel like it.
- Persons who have partners who are not always in the same city: this applies to persons who are in a relationship and live in the same city or house. One of the partner goes on long journeys or travels due to one commitment or another, work or studies. As a result, the other partner meets other people for sexual satisfaction while still in the relationship.
- People in open relationships: some define an open relationship as a romantic relationship which involves two people who are romantically involved with each other but allow sexual relationships outside their relationship.
- Persons who don’t want commitment: some persons say that they are not cut out for relationships. A section of these persons claim that they do not believe in romantic relationships or love, another section are reacting to heartbreaks from past relationships and see commitments as incompatible with human relationships. Others have their own reasons. Whatever the case, these people do not commit to one person.
- Persons who see it as a life style: this group is an offshoot of the earlier mentioned group. They could be in relationship or not, but that doesn’t stop them from having two or more sexual partners. Such a person could be referred to as a slut, flirt or a Casanova. However, these terms are derogatory.
Implications of having multiple sexual partners
- Broken relationships: people feel betrayed when they find out that their partner has other sexual partners. That relationship might not last long because of the lack of trust.
- STDs: having multiple sexual partners is a good way of getting infected by an STD. you would know which of them is infected and it is possible that one of the sexual partners have other sexual partners.
- Loneliness: humans are social being by default and we crave affection and love. Sticking to a partner tries to bridge that longing. In the case when a person falls in and out of relationships because they can’t stick to a person would leave them feeling alone in the long run. This could develop into depression.
- Depression: this is a psychological state where a person loses interest in their usual daily activities, feels sad all the time and withdraws from company. It is a leading cause of suicide in the world. Depression is caused by a lot of factors but having a loving, trusting romantic relationship could go a long way to help.
- Sex addictions: some persons find that they have an insatiable sexual taste and when their partner cannot keep them satisfied all the time, they look to other people to give them that satisfaction. This feeling could become a disorder if it is not kept in check. Click here to find out more about sex addictions.